Funny Nigeria Jokes
FUNNY NIGERIA JOKES FOR FACEBOOK UPDATES
1: An African woman married a Chinese man and had a child two months late, the child passed away.
At the funeral house the African woman kept crying and saying ’’
´I KNEW IT! I KNEW IT! IKNEW IT!!” A family member pulled her aside and asked her,”
what did you know? ” he replied Chinese product don’t last long..
At the funeral house the African woman kept crying and saying ’’
´I KNEW IT! I KNEW IT! IKNEW IT!!” A family member pulled her aside and asked her,”
what did you know? ” he replied Chinese product don’t last long..
2: SOME GIRL ARE FUNNY…They will tell the guy that
it’s over between us ‘’when the guy says okay she will be like ‘’just like that ‘’ No sister let us share the grace
it’s over between us ‘’when the guy says okay she will be like ‘’just like that ‘’ No sister let us share the grace
3: They will we be calling you my queen up and down.
Just ask them for 10k and see if the kingdom will not scatter the king will just run.
Just ask them for 10k and see if the kingdom will not scatter the king will just run.
4: DEAR LADIES AND GENTLEMEN…If you hence slept with over 10 people, you have no right to call your reproductive organ a private part, it now belong to the government under the ministry of tourism, Department of solicit of entertainment and pleasure. And if it happen to more than ten people, it now belong to the ‘’United’’ NATION under the department of Humanitarian council Donor Aid,
and if it is more than fifteen people, that means it’s now a universal charger.
and if it is more than fifteen people, that means it’s now a universal charger.
5: That awkward Moment when you are chatting with a beautiful girl at a wedding and your brother comes to tell you that: ’mom said that you should pour the remaining rice in the nylon because that will be your supper..
6: Doctor: what did you eat last night?
Cute lady: chicken, pizza, liver, sausages, fish wine
Doctor: please this is not face book just be frank and tell me the truth or I leave you to die.
Cute lady: garri, bean with borehole water
Cute lady: chicken, pizza, liver, sausages, fish wine
Doctor: please this is not face book just be frank and tell me the truth or I leave you to die.
Cute lady: garri, bean with borehole water
7: Most ladies don’t answer video call after 1pm because their faces have been restored back to factory settings.
8: Re union is when you get up in the morning and tell your wife that you are going to work, but you went to meet your neighbor to make love to her. Her husband comes and knocks on the door, you go under the bed. Her husband enters and his wife says she wants to go to the market and buy some food items. the husband takes advantage of his wife’s absence and called your wife. Your wife arrived and they made love. Suddenly his wife had gone to the market came back then she knocked the door. And you are still under the bed when unfortunately, your wife rushed to hide under the bed. This is reunion
9: Ten minutes I was bored so I decided to call the police
ME: hello help
POLICE: what happened?
ME: 60,000 people are following me!
POLICE: calm down, where are you?
ME: face book
POLICE: Idiot!!!
ME: hello help
POLICE: what happened?
ME: 60,000 people are following me!
POLICE: calm down, where are you?
ME: face book
POLICE: Idiot!!!
10: Just as I Thought I had have all until I heard someone giving the difference between Email and Gmail
Email: all the mail sent are using electricity.
Gmail: all the mail sent are using Generator.
Email: all the mail sent are using electricity.
Gmail: all the mail sent are using Generator.
11: ‘’A bank manager confused with his math’s asked his secretary to help out;
‘’ I have 23,000,000 what will you take off to get 25%?
And she replied
‘’ sir honestly I will take off my blouse my skirt, my briar even my panties .
‘’ I have 23,000,000 what will you take off to get 25%?
And she replied
‘’ sir honestly I will take off my blouse my skirt, my briar even my panties .
12: Teacher says: name one type of gas you know?
John: oxygen gas
Chris: nitrogen gas
Peter: Hydrogen gas
Akpors : tear gas
Teacher(angry ): akpors you have one more chance or else you will be punished
akpors thinks hard and says ‘’fibreglass’’
.
John: oxygen gas
Chris: nitrogen gas
Peter: Hydrogen gas
Akpors : tear gas
Teacher(angry ): akpors you have one more chance or else you will be punished
akpors thinks hard and says ‘’fibreglass’’
.
13: Teacher ‘kids tell me what your parent do for a living.
Ochuka: my mom is a teacher and my dad is a mechanic.
Teacher: Good
Jennifer: my mom is unemployed and my dad is a teacher’’
Teacher: good
Akpos: my mom is a prostitute and I don’t know my dad
Teacher: get of my class, go to the principal office and tell him what you just told me.
10 minutes later Akpos returned smiling and eating an apple
Teacher: why are you smiling? Did you tell the principal what you told me?
Akpos: yes
Teacher: what did he said?
Akpos: he just gave me an apple and asked me to give him my mom’s phone number and her address’’.
Ochuka: my mom is a teacher and my dad is a mechanic.
Teacher: Good
Jennifer: my mom is unemployed and my dad is a teacher’’
Teacher: good
Akpos: my mom is a prostitute and I don’t know my dad
Teacher: get of my class, go to the principal office and tell him what you just told me.
10 minutes later Akpos returned smiling and eating an apple
Teacher: why are you smiling? Did you tell the principal what you told me?
Akpos: yes
Teacher: what did he said?
Akpos: he just gave me an apple and asked me to give him my mom’s phone number and her address’’.
14: When a lady decides to show up on face book after sometimes of being away and post
‘’ Am back who missed me? ‘’Just know that the abortion was successful.
‘’ Am back who missed me? ‘’Just know that the abortion was successful.
15: My mom asked my brother’s girlfriend if she can cook then she replied my mum,
‘I cooked the tea we drank this morning’’
my mom is still looking for where to faint because I fainted where she was supposed to faint.
‘I cooked the tea we drank this morning’’
my mom is still looking for where to faint because I fainted where she was supposed to faint.
16: dating a slim and slender guy is cool.
The problem is that when you are lying on his chest, his ribs will end up drawing ADIDAS lines on your face..
The problem is that when you are lying on his chest, his ribs will end up drawing ADIDAS lines on your face..
17:I met a small boy crying with ten-ten naira note
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